Changes

Everything changes......the world moves on, people changes, my feelings changed, I changed... 


     Nothing is like it used to be.......definitely is not


The reality tells me that I will not be able to forget this soon, but eventually I will get over the situation.


     Being in love, with someone who worth it (at least that is what you think that it worth it) is the worst thing that happenned to me in the period of one year of a half already.


I was just 19 years old; I just wanted to feel loved, to know that someone needs me, but back to those days I think that is just really simple: You are not going to find the love of your life so soon...... 


         Every one of us knows what is the best and what is not, everybody can tell you when someone is good for you or not, your real friends will warn you and let you know that you are doing a mistake......but the heart, oh the heart is such a backstabber.


He knows that you are getting hurt by your own feelings, that you should not feel for that person....you become deaf and you don't listen any advice.


  It hurted me.
                         I injured my self.


                                                      My heart played with me.
                                                                                                  This is not fair.




Those were my thoughts............I was just too naive, and just needed to learn what life was about, not everything is about love and about finding your half.........everything is about to LIVE and to LEARN.


           Then I realice that he was there.......standing since two years ago, a listener and a watcher of my life.


He is just curious of life, of everything. I probably don't know what I want for my all life, but I admit that curiosity is something I miss sometimes; and I don't blame him for feeling like that. 


But I do blame him for the wrong expectations. I do blame him for playing with my heart and feelings....... to get satisfied his gay curiosity. 
Is not about if it is good or not...........is about thinking about what you are doing, about the damage that you can make in one life, how you can ruin one moment, how you can get in to someone's life and complicate that simple life. 


          That simple life I thought I had.....were if I wanted to have one night with someone I had it without drama.


                                                                  were love was just a play, and I was cold and never listened to my feelings. 
                                                              
                                                                  were I had a lot of fake friendship, but they were "my friends"


Of course........ I don't want that simple life, thanks to the things I have lived so far I know that our hearts don't play with us just to hurt us. They know what they do, they teach us....yes sometimes to the hard way, but that is the way that we learned.


Then your feelings change, and you realice that you are happy without those feelings you used to have, you realice that there stills love in your heart ........but not like you used to .........you changed, you learned.


And that is all about, learn from everything. Enjoy to cry, enjoy to be sad, enjoy to be happy, enjoy to have sex, enjoy to feel cheated, enjoy to feel depress so when you are feeling better you can realice that you are finally moving on. Enjoy the music in your life.......music can save, think about the soundtracks that you can have......and then you will realice that if you enjoy, you will learn from every failure, and you will realice that not all the failures are bad......that it is part of living. 


You will change, everyone will change, the world moves on.......so don't expect to feel, to want, to be......the same than  yesterday, because yesterday is gone.

Con el tiempo.....

Después de un tiempo, uno aprende la sutil diferencia entre
sostener una mano y encadenar un alma,
Que los besos no son contratos y los regalos no son promesas,
y uno empieza a aceptar sus derrotas con la cabeza alta y los ojos abiertos,
y uno aprende a construir todos sus caminos en el hoy,
porque el terreno de mañana es demasiado inseguro para planes...
y los futuros tienen una forma de caerse en la mitad.
Y después de un tiempo uno aprende que si es demasiado,
hasta el calor del sol quema.
Así que uno planta su propio jardín y decora su propia alma,
en lugar de esperar a que alguien le traiga flores.
Y uno aprende que realmente puede aguantar, que uno realmente es fuerte,
que uno realmente vale, y uno aprende y aprende... y con cada día uno aprende.
Con el tiempo aprendes que estar con alguien porque te ofrece un buen futuro
significa que tarde o temprano querrás volver a tu pasado.
Con el tiempo comprendes que sólo quien es capaz de quererte con tus defectos,
sin pretender cambiarte, puede brindarte toda la felicidad que deseas.
Con el tiempo te das cuenta de que si estás al lado de esa persona sólo por acompañar tu soledad,
irremediablemente acabarás deseando no volver a verla.
Con el tiempo entiendes que los verdaderos amigos son contados,
y que el que no lucha por ellos tarde o temprano se verá rodeado sólo de amistades falsas.
Con el tiempo aprendes que las palabras dichas en un momento de ira
pueden seguir lastimando a quien heriste, durante toda la vida.
Con el tiempo aprendes que disculpar cualquiera lo hace,
pero perdonar es sólo de almas grandes.
Con el tiempo comprendes que si has herido a un amigo duramente,
muy probablemente la amistad jamás volverá a ser igual.
Con el tiempo te das cuenta que aunque seas feliz con tus amigos,
algún día llorarás por aquellos que dejaste ir.
Con el tiempo te das cuenta de que cada experiencia vivida con cada persona es irrepetible.
Con el tiempo te das cuenta de que el que humilla o desprecia a un ser humano,
tarde o temprano sufrirá las mismas humillaciones o desprecios, multiplicados al cuadrado.
Con el tiempo comprendes que apresurar las cosas o forzarlas a que pasen
ocasionará que al final no sean como esperabas.
Con el tiempo te das cuenta de que en realidad lo mejor no era el futuro,
sino el momento que estabas viviendo justo en ese instante.
Con el tiempo aprenderás que intentar perdonar o pedir perdón,
decir que amas, decir que extrañas, decir que necesitas,
decir que quieres ser amigo, ante una tumba, ya no tiene ningún sentido, ya es tarde,
nunca dejes que algo te sea demasiado tarde.
Pero desafortunadamente, LO APRENDERAS sólo con el tiempo...

Jorge Luis Borges

Some people is just stupid, is useless, is empty and they do not take the risk to live and to make the correct things and decision for their lifes.

But the worst things of all is when you realize that you might be one of them.............and that you are not making everything that you can for be the best that you can.

This is the thing: If you dont take in consideration that you have to be someone else and better, no one will do it.

The Ilussion is dying!

This is going over.........at least that is what my heart is telling me.
     The ilussion is going over , the love I have for you stills there, but is not making me react as it use to be.

I'm afraid because Ilussions always hurt when you realize that they are not possible, or maybe that you are better  and that ilussion is something just.........useless!........


This feeling will keep in my heart...........but the ilussion is going away for sure.........so If you react someday .......Im afraid of not reacting anymore.!

Dance dance dance!